Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Flamenco Flamenco: Funnily Nice

So Aliet suggested we go to a Cinema that none of us know , to watch a movie that none of us knows anything about , and always I got thrilled and we went , we missed the first showing and so we got to see the second.

I got all stressed about the Prayer of Maghreb , but then I did it in the lobby ,,, hehehe and then I got in with Aliet , her mom , Lubna and her mom and we watched Two Hours of Flamenco!!
At the beginning I thought its gonna be a movie with acting in it , but it was a documentary!

But after I accepted the idea I actually enjoyed it.

The best part of it all was Miguel Poveda's performance ,,, he is a singer from Catalonia up north and he seems to be the only catalan guy to sing flamenco ... he does it in a very touching way , he is the type of hard looking but tender guys who sings from the depth of his heart and with that magical throat of his everything that comes out is just great.

I loved the evening , and although I read a lot of negative criticism in the net about the movie - saying that it was not loyal to the traditional spirit of flamenco , which I agree with to some point- but all in all I loved the evening , so thanks to my friends :)

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Monachil: A nice mistake that led to an Original day!

Today we woke up to go to the trip that our Portuguese suggested many weeks ago. She said that we should go Sierra Nevada , which is a place that tourists from all over the world come to visit and to ski.

Last year my friends went and I did not , I was like :'' I hate having my clothes wet, and I hate coldness'' , but this time I went with them just for the sake of not ''missing it''.

Our french friend Flora got the information from the internet and it said we should go to a town called Monachil and from there we can reach the Ski Station.

We got on the bus and we went , the driver said that after he drops us we should walk a kilometer and a half and then we will reach the town. Now as I think about it , it surprises me , in Jordan I would go bargaining about 100 meters and here I have no problem walking KILOMETERS!!

Anyway , as we walked through the amazing town we found out that reaching the Station needs a car , you know , the street goes in funny tine twisted pavementless streets that goes up the mountains, but it was totally ok for all of us , we were just happy to be there.

It is not a thing that I can express in a post. I was so happy , looking around me I was pleased by the nature and the continuous water noise with the river going in all directions. People were so nice, they were true country people , pure , welcoming and warm ....

I prayed by the river and when the bus came unannounced I had to cross the street shoe less holding my boats and my prayer mat in my both hands ,,, I was happy and that was one original day , Alhamdulial

Coffee in Monachil ,,, I love the coffee drinking tradition in order to bond with the place

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Two times in the Movies: Complete waste of money

I went to the movies here in Spain two times , just for the sake of going out with my friends.

One of them was a Spanish movie that SUCKED with all possible dimensions of the word. It was about a woman losing her sight and being chased by some kind of freak , whose mother acted like she is blind and then it turns out that she is not ,,, I dont know what I dont know what and then the movie ends without cleaning the mess of questions it has caused by its pure stupid plot!!!

The second movie was Harry Potter's seventh or eighth movie , and given the fact that I have not seen any of the previous movies I did not get a thing :s ....

But anyways for the sacred darkness of a movie theater I dont care about all the wasted money , I just LOVE IT :)

First Actual Round under the Rain on my Bike:)

Oh My God , I am soooooooooooooo thrilled and happy about the round I just took on my bike.
I got home at 11 , I thought about taking out the bike under the rain and try to ride it down the hell , I had the same idea yesterday but I did not go at the end , and today I said: Just take it out!! If it works out then have fun , and if not then just go back home.

And so I went , under the rain alone with my nice bike ,,,, I crossed the empty streets and saw the twinkling rain drops under the street yellow lights , I felt the air and the adrenaline and I felt like flying ... I was happy , and I felt some subtitles going down my head saying: This is one of THOSE moments ,,, THOSE moments ,,,

I owned the streets , I went down to the extranjeria and the hospital , and actually rode on asphalt for the very first time .... My Bike suddenly got a name: Beiro! The name of the neighborhood I reached - not knowing it was there- as I drove.

I just cant explain how happy I am ...
Purely Happy ,,, Truly Truly Happy ..

Friday, November 26, 2010

You me and Dupree

Mmmmm ,,, it was meant to be a great movie but it is not!
This only works for Dypree but not for everybody ,,, but its enjoyable in a way

Thursday, November 25, 2010

How much I miss speaking Japanese

I cant believe that I really STOPPED going to japanese class and with the time going by I started losing the things I already know ,,, I just feel helpless in front of videos like this one ,,, I feel that I am close to understanding but then I dont understand ...

This is one of the mistakes of my life that Enshalla I will make right as soon as possible ,,,

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Exactly how I feel

This explains much

It is not that I wanna go back ,,, I just dont feel right doing what am doing where am doing it,,, But it used to be better at home ,,, I will get over it enshalla ....

Crazy friends making the evenings more fun

The only person who passed in the deserted street took the picture for the five of us ...
Dina - Lebanon , Me - Jordan , Koshya - Polonya , Matina - Polonya , Rasha - Jordan ..

I just love them... I love how enthusiastic and life loving they are ...

Monday, November 22, 2010

About Antonio de Milano

Tonight I went to Manila for the usual movie night...

There is not much to say about the thing am posting about , but I just feel like writing it down.
The guy who works in Manila is just amazing. Antonio , he is Italian from Milano. He speaks with a funny yet nice italian accent. He is somewhere between blonde and brown - or better ''moreno''- and his face hair is not neat but has a unique style that adds kindness to his face.

He is the type of waiter who makes each client feel spacial and important , he adds a smile to his sentences and there is some special warmth about him. This is not some poetic exaggeration , this is nothing compared to how warm and amazing this guy is.

Today ,everybody was all busy with the movie and I gazed at him for a moment. He was leaning on the beer tap and looking at the silent crowd. I thought how happy would a woman be with him, he is masculine but with a feminine side. I wondered how would his hugs be and suddenly out of no where it just popped to my mind : Its always another woman!

I would always see those outstanding men - and they are few- and think how they would be to there women ,,, the women whom I am never in there shoes ,,,

Its not about Antonio himself ,,, he is just an example ,,, a pure thing ,, a bell on the doorstep of my mind ,,, ~sigh~

Friday, November 19, 2010

Happy Birthday Blog: 2 Years and many more to come

Dear blog ,,, IT has been two years now , I am happy that I have you and therefor having a written record of my thoughts and memories.

Best of luck , from me to you ...

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Bikey Bike :D

I got the bike today!!
The guy called , I went down , took the bike and went back home feeling so ... Overwhelmed?

Monday, November 15, 2010

An evening saying the things that I hate to say

I spent this evening in Cafe Bar Manila watching a movie called Checkpoints thats supposed to be about the suffering of Palestinian people on checkpoints all along their land.

The movie goes for 80 minutes showing daily conversations between Israeli troops and Palestinian people trying to convince the troop to let him/her pass. It shows that if the Palestinian dude makes a good conversation with the troop then he would actually convince him to let him pass!!

So when the movie was over they asked if anyone would like to comment and I jumped almost involuntarily and talked how far from realism is the movie ,,, then there started one of the most boring conversations I would ever have ,,,

I t was a very good conversation , in which Rasha , a Palestinian guy who happened to be there and I cleared some vague ideas for the audience. But then they started the gay conversation of ''violence would not solve the problem''. Do they actually hear themselves when they talk?!! DO they think that Israel would be interested in any peace shit and do accept the solution of the two states?!!! Do they believe that talking would solve that? do they believe that a Zionist Jew Israeli troop who is designed to ''clean'' the world from arabs , whose entire existence is about his promised land and his chosen people would ever care about I have to say?!!

This kind of conversations normally pisses me off but I was calm along the way in order to let people ask and wonder and therefor liberate their minds from what TV tells them all the time ..

A girl participated in the conversation and she said : ''I am an Israeli'' and my mind went blank for a while ... she said that a relative of hers died in an attack and that the movie bothers her because it shows a bad face for Israel (AS if Israel has another one!!!) .

We told her that being a troop and pointing a gun at the heads of innocent people is not a job , she said that she decided not to serve in the army but it was a hard decision to make , and I was like '; what do you want now? a prize? a ''thanks for no killing my children'' award?
The girl was afraid , and she did not talk much (good for her , becuase I was on the mood to wipe the floor with whatever would make the face of Palestine look ugly).

A guy participated in the conversation too much and he was smart and responsible , he made some interesting questions, like ''What now? How do we solve this conflict?'' and I had one word in my head ''Struggle'' which is the English term for ''Jihad'' but people would not understand , or I might be deported from the entire country.

Antonio closed up the conversation, and thanked everybody for coming and we called the night. It was good , but having to ask for a permission to resist is just disgusting.

What do you know about Palestine? what do you know about what the people who has been mortified for the last 62 years? what do you know about losing your family and your money for the mere idea of being whom you are?! What do you know about this genocide?

Please dear World , if you dont know enough about Palestine , please have the decency to shut up.

Watch the movie , imagine if that was going on in your own city, how would it feel?

A bike alarm!!!

Today I was doing more rounds for my bike , and I went across that cool shop in Realejo and I had a cute conversation with the girl who works there , and as I told her I wanted a fold able bike that would not top 200 euros she was like ''Noooooooooooooo'' . She said that the ones she have are too expensive - one of them costs 900 but its 9 Kgms only!!!- and she said: Take care when you buy a cheap one , those things fold you dont want them to break. - And I was like: I never thought about this possibility- and she said: Maybe you would like to look in a second hand shop , and I was like: A light bulb lighting on the side of my head!!! Why I never thought about it?!!

So I went back home and after 5 minutes of search I came across this ad:

50 euros!! and it is not even used , he said in another ad - when he was asking for 60 euros- that it was a gift and he is selling it because he does not use it. So I picked up the phone and called the guy , and we are meeting tomorrow in the biking lane of Cartuja here close to my house,,,

Please let this be good ...

I will have 150 euros in my budget that I can actually use in Madrid hehehehe :)

Friday, November 12, 2010

To survive without God

Today I went to Hispanoamerican Literature class for the first time. I noticed a group of korean students sitting right behind me and only one of them sitting three of four seats away from me in the same line.

I thought about them for a while. I thought it should be really hard for them to understand all the spanish that is used in the class and all the historical information mentioned. I dont know why I thought that, for instance I am Jordanian - Asian too and I belong to a very different culture compared to the Hispanic culture- and then I noticed their clothing, their books , their voice recorders and their cute red electronic dictionaries.

I thought how Asian people specially Koreans dont have a religion and they seem just fine.
The class was boring ,, really boring so I kept thinking , how do they live their day by day life not even being athiest? they just dont give it a thought ...
And meanwhile I was dozing off and daydreaming my desk started shaking and my pens rolled down and fell , I looked and the korean girl who was in my line has dropped her pen and started getting spasms and she started to slide down falling off her chair!!!
For a while I was shocked and could not really think about anything , but when she started sliding down I ran to her and held her head so she wont pump it to the chairs ,,,

It was so scary , you know , becuase I could not understand what got into her ,,, it was like she was getting electrocuted and shaking , and the look on her face !! Oh my God the look on her face , she was totally conscious to what was going on with her and she seemed helpless not being able to control her own body , and not being able to stop it!

What happened later is not important ,,,,the spanish girls proved one more time that they are useless - no offense buddies- but they acted out in the traditional ''I am freaked out because I have zero experience'' behavior. They were even impolite piling around the girl and trying to get a better angle to look!

But as I went over the scene again I remembered that when I first saw her I said involuntarily "Bism Allah'' >> By the name of God ... I dont wanna go all mystic , but if the option of calling Gods name when you are afraid seemed very soothing ,,, I am happy I have a God , I can be afraid for a while but am never mortified.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

As I passed by the Monastery

As I passed by the monastery today I remembered when I used to live there ...
Those were perfect days ,,, I remember that it was a continuous magical moment..
I was so broke and so lonely but still it was a dream ,,, this year , things are fine , but not magical ,,
not as magical as the bells of the monastery ringing in the windy nights ,,, not at all

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Where the hell is my salary?

This picture is quite inspiring for me as it has been ten days since the beginning of this month and yet they did not pay me my salary ,,,

But in spite of the tiny budget I have I dont feel the feeling that I used to have last year : The endless fall in the bottomless hole of poverty.

My soul cracked as money disappeared into no where and gave me that hollow feeling of loneliness and anger.

Although I might get my salary after ten more days , but at least am getting some good money , and so help me God am going to Barcelona ;)

My Mr Right

Mr. Right is a part of the title of an interesting book called '' The Book of Rules: How to Capture the Heart of Mr Right".

I first heard about that back when I was in high school , a very special friend of mine was reading it and I thought to myself: Huh , as if I need that.

I thought - by then- that I got it all figured out (I cant find another phrase to finish the sentence so I am just gonna leave that way).

The time has passed since then and I discovered few facts about myself when it comes to men:
1- I can be there very best friend
2- They can be me bestest friends
3- They can still be my friends until they are in love , engaged or married , by then I freak out , I get all awkward and 99% of the times I sneak out of the friendship.
4- I can easily get a crush on anybody.
5- I can easily lose the crush if I get a more important thing to do.
6- I said in my mind the phrase ''I am so in love with..." almost 6 times in the last 6 years and I always get a moment where I wonder if any of that was true.
7- I have a lot of values that I cant go around which makes it so inconvenient for me to be in love. - its not that am better or worse than other girls , but am a country side traditional person -
8-I might seem so open about my feelings and I share too much , but when it comes to the real stuff I dont really share with almost anybody , not even my own mother , which makes men feel unneeded.
9- I am shy >> yes this surprises me , I am all out going and have a low social fence , but sometimes I keep a comment or an idea to myself for no obvious reason.
10- Poetry , novels , movies and songs have really messed up my head and elevated my criteria.

So ....

Today I was on the bus almost heading to nowhere, I though I might get down to get my residency papers done. When I first got on the bus there was a guy in front of me , he tried to pass his card ore than once and it did not count, he got a little worried and he said to the driver: I charged it yesterday ... he looked back at me apologizing for making me wait and I nodded ''Its ok'' nod.

Then I sat on a funny curve that only exists in line 33 buses and I gazed around.

The guy stood ahead of me and gazed too ...
He was so handsome, just like a magazine cover , his jacket , his shirt , his pants and his shoes where all matching in a way that looked so spontaneous.
But the thing that really got me thinking is his far away look ,,, now I remember a video of Russel Peters where he speaks about the way men can sit for 15 minutes thinking about extremely NOTHING. I noticed that this was so true , and this is why this guy´s far away look got my attention.
He looked smart therefor he looked attractive.

I started my ''bus mental activity'' answering the set of questions I always make inside my head when I am using strangers as characters: Whats his name? How old is he? what does he do? Is he satisfied with what he accomplished? What are his dreams? What makes him laugh? what makes him cry? Is he simple,complicated , nice , mean, deep , shallow, creative or normal kind of person?

I could not get much answers ,,,

Thats him in the picture above!!
Afterwards I decided - for no obvious reason- that I wanna follow him. Maybe I wanted to know where does men like him come from. He got off the bus and I went after him keeping a distance ,,,, I walked and my heals made a lot of noise -or so I thought- I lost him almost three times along the way , but as I walked faster around the curves I could always trace him again ,,,, After almost 15 minutes of walking he entered the building you see in the picture under this paragraph.

It was a hostel! He is not from here ,,, why does he have a Granada bus card if he is not from here? when does he leave? where does he leave to? who is he and why -just why- he got me thinking about my Mr. Right?

Ps: If you think this is a sick post then maybe you should not be reading this blog , I am a curious cat so live with it.

Never thought I would say this: I have winter depression!

I am depressed!! It really coasts me too much to talk or have fun ... Ok I do have fun but I just hate that I hate going out.

Who would ever believe that I would prefer staying at home better than going out to anywhere?! but this is the case , the weather has changed in a brutal way and all of a sudden its so damn cold outside that my skull freezes and a thing in my chest hurts every time am out!!

I hate it I hate it I hate it!! I hate worrying about a jacket and long leather boots and an umbrella everytime I wanna step outside the door !!

I am just mad ,, I need time to deal with this ugly change ,, until then I am gonna be in my bed reading and watching movies and eating junk food

What I see: Its raining bicycles !!

I swear to God I cant remember when I last craved something that money can buy as much as am craving the bicycle ...

But sometimes I thank God that I did not get my payment yet , I would always tell myself: When they pay me am gonna buy the bicycle. I dont want to rush into it , I wanna think , chose wisely, enjoy , and not pay much.

I am thinking about it all the time , GODDDDDDDD I look at the streets and all what I see is bicycles!! I dont even notice cars nor motorcycle ... Only bicycles so glamorous , shiny and wonderfully.

I look at people riding their bikes in the middle of Gran Via and I just wonder if I would ever be brave enough to do that ... Like really drive infront of a line 8 Huge bus ...

I notice how people peddle, how do they slow down on curves , when the pavement is crowded, how do they pass from between obstacles and how do some of them actually ride with no handlebars!!!

Some seem like they are flying ,,, some look so happy ,,, and so I got one more reason to love Cartuja for the carril we have so we can ride safely on normal streets , nothing like the crazy hill in which my faculty is situated.

I wanna pick pick pick ...
A good bike that would cling to me when I leave and say: Dont leave me behind I love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.
I love those lines :)

This is a 400 euros 11 Kgm fold-able bike I saw in a shop in Zaidin ,,, it broke my heart ... I cant pay that much!!!
And I think this is the winner , 195 Ibiza that I saw in Neptuno ...

Lets just wait and see :)

I just feel like sweeping the street!!

I feel like sweeping the street infront of my house ,,, it was nice and romantic at the beginning but now its wet leaves that makes you slide like and idiot!

Monday, November 8, 2010

Cafe Bar Manila .... Just WOW!!

Tonight we had a very cute experience in Cafe Bar Manila ...

I had very different plans for the evening but Rasha came from her class and said that her friend said that a movie was going to be presented in some place close to Isabel Catolica.

While waiting I saw Alba , my student coming along with a friend of hers and hey were heading ti the same place. I thought it would be a theater or something but then the girl came and took us from Plaza Isabela Catolica to a an almost small cafe-bar ...

There was a bunch of people , different looks , different hair cuts , different languages , different accents and with the vegetarian + environment friendly ambient of the bar I felt like I was back in the seventies ,,, the movie was about human rights ,, this is what they said and so I felt ike am gonna be offered marijuana anytime heheheh ...

It was so easy to mingle with those folks!! they were very sociable , nice and they dont judge ,,,
I dont , but I have always felt around here that am being watched ,, you know people would always notice my as the ''arab'' ''muslim'' girl with the ''different outfit'' .. Tonight i got the magical feeling of being able to be lost among the crowd ...

Usually this kind of getting together's would make me a little nervous , but I dont know ,, I was very comfortable today ,,, I loved the place and the people ,, everything ...

They played the movie , Its name is ''Balseros" telling the story of the suffering of cuban citizens who wanted to go to USA illegally making ships and travelling in the ocean.

It was very sad , I dont want to say that adjective ''sad'' where I dont feel the hell that those people has gone through ,,, the scenes where they were separated from their loved ones , where they said good bye not knowing if they would meet again or not , it just reminded me of our eternal misery in Palestine when people used to listen a radio show where the ones who are still alive would send their greetings to their families wishing that they would hear them and know that they are still alive .

I remembered the scene from ''Tagreeba el Falasteenyye" when Rushdis mother called the radio exactly when he left the radio side and went to the street ,,, he lived his life wanting to hear her voice and when she did call his name he was not there to hear it.

Palestine the biggest wound of all ,,, the biggest cultural and historical robbery, it just came to me while I watched the pains of other cultures.

It was great and they have a cycle of movies that we are gonna attend in the coming weeks enshalla ,,,,

Rasha's tapas
Rasha and I all comfy on the red chair

Gran via looked different after spending two hours in the dark watching the movie.

Good night my Charming Granada

Sunday, November 7, 2010

A very tricky Arabic class

Today I had this very tricky arabic class ,, my usual student Alba came along with a new friend of hers who was longing to learn arabic as well .

The other friend -Audrey- knew something of arabic from before and as the class went I started feeling troubled , I could not sync between the things that Audrey knew and Alba did not or the opposite ,and for a moment I thought that I should stop the class because it was a mess inside my head , and then I remembered an example I read many years ago that says: you will never get better on your bike if you stop cycling.

So I kept on cycling and guess what: I got the two of them to learn new stuff from me and from each other , I managed to give each one of them the information that she needs and after 1 hour and 15 minutes I paid attention that Alba now knows all the letter that form her name and she wrote it down for the first time in her life in ARABIC!!!

It was a big moment for both of us ,, for her as a learner and for me as a teacher :)
I am happy .. Alhamudillalh

Thats Alba and I
And this is the page where she wrote her name in Arabic for the very first time !!!!

Friendly Strangers: An evening in Konya :)

Tonight I spent many hours in Konya , I gave an arabic class and then made three friends from Pais Vasco ( Ider , Iker , Maitena) ,,, it was smooth and easy how we started the conversation and got to know each other and then left.

Also there was Antonio the creepy guy - I dont know why I call him that but he is kinda creepy- and he insisted on buying us something - me and alaa - and after saying no a few times he still insisted so I was like: what the hell!! If you will let me have my drink on my table without you coming close to my circle then why not , so we had Lemon and ment juice.

There is something about Antonio that makes me sympathize with him ... he is old and lonely and although he has the money ti be living in a huge mansion or ranch he prefers to live in Granada Capital and mix with the students.

Maybe he does not accept the fact that he grew old , but if I were him I would not have accepted it too ,,,, getting old is an experience that requires a true friend or a true love.

For the last days I was thinking about that ,, I do all what I can to keep the strings between me and the people I love , but it does not matter anyway ,, there are people whom no matter how hard you try to keep them they just fall out of your life. lovers and friends ,,,

So if God would help I would take some of Antonios shit , just in case I need Karma when I am as old and lonely as him.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Smiling alone on the bus stop

So yesternight I had a conversation with Laura my flatmate and she made me see something that I did not see before. A thing that am not gonna mention here for my own sentimental status , however I was waiting for people to realize a thing and I was mad they did not. Laura said maybe they are waiting for me to realize the same thing and they were mad I did not.

It was a matter of who would take the initiative and Laura said: why not you? and at 1 a.m I talked and I got a fast reply , a thing that I have not expected in the 8 months I spent being mad!!

The other day I was alone waiting for the bus , and as I looked at the things around me - the same things I see every time when I wait for the bus - I realized that I was smiling alone ,,, a smile that was pouring in all directions of my face , a smile that glows , twinkles and draws attention ...

I was happy ...
Like in ''child is happy'' ... I know that this is as good as it gets ,, it cant get any better , it just would not. But I accept it with a big heart ... a heart that loves God and believes in his wisdom and well . If thats what God wants then its the best for me and yes: I am happy for losing the best thing that ever happened to me.

You are gonna be missed ,,, or not

Thursday, November 4, 2010

It is not over yet

I returned the bike!!!

I dont know ,,, or I know ,,, Yesterday I took a ride with the new bike , I was worried about everything , you know , falling in the street infront of everybody , looking stupid while trying to make this Bike thingy work ..

But when I went down the hell of my house I was flying in happiness and safety ,, I got an overwhelming nice and soothing feeling ,,

This is the concept of riding a bike ,, feeling like a child and a free soul , but when it came to the bike it just was not the one ,,, it was heavy when I fold it , and it folds in stupid way that takes space!!

I did it , in no time , I decided and took it back to Alcampo and I am relieved ,,,

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

I got the Bike!!!

After a long time going in rounds and looking for the perfect bike I finally got this one...

I went to where it was twice during the night and looked at it ,,, I was happy to have it but there is something about it ,,, what?