Dear Future Me , When you re-read this: Dont Panic.
I love Ahmad Al-Shukairi , and although I feel so lonely inside my own understanding of my personality as a Muslim , Ahmad Al-shukairi represents me.
He represents me down to the deepest point of my faith , still for the second year in a row I postpone watching his show. It is not that I say: ''I am not gonna watch him'' . But I keep telling myself: Maybe soon.
Because he has a very motivating discourse. He points out what's important. He shows the dynamic part of Islam , the part where I need to move my ass and get to work to make the world a better place. He fills me with energy , with a true will to change and be changed , to inspire and be inspired.
Yet I feel that if I got this inspiration it would depress me. Because I have always found a gap between the things I am capable of doing and the things that I actually do.
Motivation has always depressed me , I always found myself tied down to an invisible cord and it goes inside my mind this way: ''Maybe Later''.
Watching Al-shukairi is on my list ,,,, and my list does not have much points by the way , I scratch away the things that would not change me for the better ,,, as for those who do change me: I pray and work on my issues , may God help me cut the cord.