Ever since I came back from Spain I wanted to talk about this ...
Although it has been a long time - 3 months and 3 days to be accurate - but I felt misplaced in my own house. I wont say replaced but I could not seem to find my place again ,,, when I left my nephew was a very little thing , and when I came back I found that he changed and changed the face of my family as I always knew it.
Our house was always quiet, clean , we ate together , did our things and watched an Egyptian Tv Series together and then go to bed. We have few family and Amman, many people visited our house but it was always us: Mom, Dad, my bother and me.
It took me so much time to cope with the idea that I now have a sister in law who will always be around. So much time!! And ever since I came back me nephew has been stirring the silence that I always cherished in my home ,, my parents are no longer Mom and Dad , but they are Grandpa and Grandma ,,,
It felt so weird for me , I was always the tiniest person in my fathers eyes and I have been the ultimate target of his care. Now , someone is sharing that with me and my family have CHANGED.
It was not a matter of jealousy - as I thought at the beginning- as much as its a matter of ´´change´´ , which - obviously- I had never been to accept without taking all the time available.
Today my nephew fell ,,, he was trying to walk and I did not catch him and he fell!! he landed on his head ,,, it was horrible , i thought that I killed him , he cried so much and shake , they took him to the hospital but they said that he is Ok and brought him back home.
Now as I see him I feel so thankful that he is alive!!
I love the mess he makes , and I just accept that my home has changed ,,, it did and there is nothing that I can do about it.
Well there is one thing that I can do about it: I can take advantage!! When I go to Spain I will be sure that there is someone keeping moms and dads company so they will not notice my absence ... is not taking advantage just good?!!
1 comment:
great photo toto <3
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